Living a New Dream

 After life spinning wildly and uncontrollably into a creative black hole, there is finally a blinding light at the end of the tunnel. I have offically gone up in the world, and since departing ways with my greatest love,  I have been living a new dream... 
From a trailer park in Bristol


My new trailer park life is exactly how I like it. Raw, rural and real. 

It reminds me of the places I used to live in before they were bulldozed for luxury flats and bespoke bistros. It’s a super industrial wasteland, a desolate jungle peppered sparsely with barely a soul on site. 

Everything unravelled rather quickly from my life in London, I had a super sweet deal studio wise.  But sadly, the magic carpet was stepped on and I went flying off… And without an art studio, I officially had no reason to live. 
 Friends told me to get a real job- but I still wasn’t prepared to sacrifice my creativity for a job I hated to endure in a city that was not kind.   

A City Speaks asked me to write a piece about being an artist leaving London- The tone of the article sounds rather depressing…but as luck would have it, after moving away, my life has improved dramatically and I can safely say that currently, I am extraordinary happy :D

I landed on my feet. And I landed in Bristol. 
THIS IS MY NEW STUDIO WOOO!!!!
Got myself a massive space in a warehouse. I've been working underground for years, and finally, I have light! It's a beauty, rammed to the rafters but I luurrrrve it.

I came to Bristol on a whim. According to surveys- it’s the happiest place in the UK,  and to my recollection, no one has ever said a bad thing about the place. Bristol feels great to be in.  It’s not trying to be anything, it’s not trying to fit in or be cool,  it’s just living its life and I love it.

.
After being away from the city, coming back for a costume job was horrendous . The rage rose with every tube I took, every elbow that crooked, and inside I could feel feelings I hadn’t felt since moving away.  It was rush hour that broke the banks of my humanity, and after a relentless barrage of fuck you from every angel and elbow, I became the default person I needed to be just to make it to a safe place.

You slip back into bad habits rather quickly when surrounded by the triggers of your old existence. You find yourself being the person you need to be. Cold and hard.  I am not that person. I don’t want to be that person and I don’t need to be that person.

 How people endure this everyday is beyond me, it’s just not normal…but it is made to seem normal. Everyman is an island here. There is no kindness spared, a gaze is rarely met with a smile. 
How I survived for ten years here is beyond me. But hindsight is only achieved through time and distance and this distance has given me the clarity I need to start moving forward with my new life here and I am happy J


Looking forward to defrosting these god forsaken freezers ;)

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