Internet Dating

 I used to be a hardcore serial internet dater on and off for about 5 years. I did them all- Plenty of Fish, Guardian Soulmates, E-Harmony, Forget Dinner. I was a massive fan of Gumtree dating but the site got closed down because of all the weirdo's ; ). I used to like taking my dates to the Hunterian Museum (
 Many things have come out of these random experiences-One guy contacted this year but he didn't have that special something. Weeks later he contacted me again saying he was a photographer- yeah right. I decided to believe him and meet him to talk about a doing some potential shoot- the front cover for 'Le Cool'. I decided I was feeling cool and to go ahead and do it. He wanted to go on location to some wasteland in East London. Suspicious.

The day of the shoot he came to my garage to collect the stuff. I've never seen anyone gag so much in all my life! Every time he got a whiff he pretty much started to cry. The photo shoot consisted of me and a friend tossing a rotten deers head to each other, Canary Wharf in the background, weird internet man snapping away... I thought this  whole thing was just a big elaborate plan to kill me but it turns out it was true! He really was a photographer and the deer photo made it to the front cover.
He wasn't really that weird.  He was very normal. I was the one with a garage full of rotting animals tucked away in south london....


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