D.I.Y Taxidermy with Diesel
I was deeply nervous for about a week before the show. Crippling sleep loss type stuff. Nerves have never got me before. I just blank it out and don't think about the performance till I’m in it- It's complete spontaneous improvisation. I never know what I'm going to do. I find if you plan things then they go wrong. If you don't then everything is a bonus and surprise.
I felt very differently this time. I started to over think, plan and stress about the show and I put a lot of mental pressure on myself. Worrying about what I was going to say- Would I even have anything to talk about? What if I was rubbish? Usual stuff.
After a week I decided this was silly and to get over myself. I always have something to say! The fear was replaced by my normal emotions. I wanted this D.I.Y Taxidermy to have somthing extra . Stuffing animals wasn't enough.
Lightening struck a few days before the event in the form of Chat Magazine!
LIFE! DEATH! PRIZES! That's the title of this issue. Genius. What brilliant inspiration for a raffle! Another interactive dimension to the whole D.I.Y.T experience. Life is cheap after all! Now I had to make original prizes. ....Luckily I was visiting the gamery that day and found 5 deer feet in a bin. They were crying out for utensils to be stuck on the end. I settled on a grater... my mum suggested a vibrator. Here is one happy winner!
This was the most sober I have ever been whilst doing a show. I had one bottle of beer. Usually I hide and drink in silence, saving it for the stage. But this time I had nowhere to hide and no free bar!!! I have a tendency to hyperactivity if other substances do not suppress it...
I was feeling extra super pumped. I knew in my mind how I wanted to be-like one of those hardcore shopping channel lady hosts- Overly passionate, really full on and bizarrely compelling. I started off a bit normal. Some basic tips and techniques, also dropping in the fact that I was single (still am) and then the floodgates opened…With little more than a Britney microphone attached to my head, a scalpel and some dead pets, I gave that audience everything I had! I became intentional and purposeful verbal diarrhoea. A constant stream of energetic and hugely enthusiastic chatter, arms and legs flailing about. I laid myself on a plate and was totally honest about the horrific depths I go to. It is extreme. It is weird to keep a room full of rotting animals at a high temperature....but when your fascinated with somthing you want to find out about every single thing about it! I told the audience about my secret thoughts and of the things I do when no one's looking. ... I told them of my tears over the horror and my war wounds I have suffered for my art. I even told them about the cat. My mother came for the first time and asked if I had been taking speed. But that's just what happens when you put someone on stage with a mild hyperactivity disorder and intense passion.
After this bizarre episoide I revealed the mystery star prize for the raffle.....The freshly stuffed rabbit! Yes, one lucky member actually got to take it home that night. Now thqt's entertainment!!!!
Overall nothing went wrong...No one threw paint at me. There were no awkward questions, everybody seemed to enjoy themselves and I came out completely alive! After it was all over I felt weird and extremely hyperactive. A mixture of fullness and emptiness all at once. It seems like all your life builds up to one moment, and when that moment has gone what do you do with all the other moments and that extra energy??? What do you do with all the extra head room? What's next? Where is my next kick coming from? What my new reason to live? It feels like you can never achieve enough. You have to start the exhausting process again and again, making bigger goals for yourself. Constantly pushing forward, inventing things to do with all of this whatever this is you have inside yourself. Creating your reason to live.
I was asked by a film person where this was going? What was the future of D.I.Y Taxidermy. I was stumped?! I've never thought about these things. Maybe we'll have a nice sit down meal or auction myself out for a one on one.
More photos can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Charlie-Tuesday-Gates-Artist-person/136474813038151